Coping with the ‘Terrible Twos’

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Amber from Teen Mom UK shares how she copes with the terrific and ‘terrible twos.’

Here’s what Amber says in the video if you can’t watch it…

One of the biggest struggles as a Mum I have right this minute in time is, now that Brooklyn’s 2 years of age, he’s in his ‘terrible twos,’ I find it really hard to actually cope with his behaviour.

As, you know he is my first child at the end of the day. Obviously when he was a baby he was so much easier to look after as he wasn’t really interacting with anything, like as he’s a baby, whereas now he’s at the age where he’s wanting to touch everything, he’s wanting to do everything, he’s wanting to interact, communicate and everything.

With his behaviour right this minute it’s like been a bit of a like worry of mine because he’s been going through like biting stages and I know all kids go through it but obviously like, Brooklyn’s my child you know, so I need to find a way I can cope with that.

So, I was just finding it really hard, I was thinking like I was the world’s worst mother you know, ‘cause I just didn’t know what to do.

We’d be out shopping and he’d be screaming and screaming and like get people’s attention, people looking.

I’m just like – I felt a bit embarrassed you know and I’m just thinking ‘I don’t know what to do, I really don’t know what to do.’ And it’s not like that I’m ashamed or anything like that because all kids scream and I’ve kind of understood that now.

I used to think like that Brooklyn’s the only baby in the world, the only baby that’s screaming but obviously, going round and seeing other mums etc look like they’re struggling as well with their kids, it’s just kind of made me think like, I don’t want to obviously carry on with this for the next couple of years.

So I took myself to some little parent classes just to get a bit of help and support and how I can handle these situations.

When we go out for dinner, that’s like a main thing, that’s when everything happens like throwing bottles everywhere, he’s even threw a chicken nugget once that’s landed in someone else’s plate.

He’s just crazy, and I do think obviously he’s 2 and wanting to do everything but like, it can sometimes be just a little embarrassing you know, like people looking at you and like ‘oh that mum’s not doing anything.’

So this is why I needed the help and I needed the support of someone else you know, someone whose already been through those like situations.

And kind of what I’ve got out of it is like, he’s my child so like I should bring him up how I want and like he’s 2 years of age now and I think I’ve done a pretty good job of how he is brought up, you know.

All I can say is like, just try your best.

And just like I do you know, you can’t give, I give Brooklyn as much attention as he wants but obviously I can’t give him 24 hours of the day like attention.

But like you just need to get on with it. I think now, what is like a good way of teaching Brooklyn of the rights and wrongs.

So a right would be, he’s done something really good, he’s put his toys back in his box you know, give him a big hug, give him a big cuddle, tell him ‘well done’, give him a kiss, smile, all of those types of things.

But then if he’s done something wrong, like really naughty like he’s bitten me or he’s pulled my hair or he’s chucked a toy at the TV he needs to kind of know that that is wrong.

So instead of using like verbally shouting etc, I just thought a calm way to do it or deal with it is just to put him in the corner.

So he knows now that corner is his naughty corner and if he’s naughty that’s where he’ll go and sit and because I’ve been doing that for the past month now, he’s kind of getting used to it now so I can say to him like ‘that’s really naughty Brooklyn, don’t do that, go to the corner.’

And he’s getting used to it, he’ll go over to the corner now and when he’s good he comes back, I give him a cuddle and say ‘you know, you can’t do these things.’

And honestly just doing that has helped me so much like, you know he’s starting to realise now that being naughty is bad in a way.

I can just tell in the past couple of weeks his behaviour has been so much more better.

I can take him to play areas now and not have to worry about him screaming or taking another kid’s sock off or whatever.

And I’ve been out for dinner, been out for dinner with Ste, everyone – we can just have a peaceful dinner you know?

It’s just been so much better lately and I think that’s like all down to me  and I kind of always think, you know, as much as I might say ‘am I doing this right?‘

I am doing it right because all I can say is like, all I’m doing is trying my best.

I’m bring Brooklyn up on my own, obviously with the support of Ste by my side.

But we’re bringing Brooklyn up separately, as we’re not together, so it’s a bit hard to co parent with Ste as well because it’s like, he’s doing one thing at mine, he’s doing another at Ste’s.

But we’re getting around it. I think it’s so much better that me and him are getting on because Brooklyn sees everything that goes on, Brooklyn hears the shouting, hears us arguing.

It’s just not nice so it’s just so much better to actually have this relationship now that Brooklyn can see.

And since me and Ste have been getting on so well, I’ve seen this massive change in Brooklyn’s behaviour and it just makes me so happy.

It makes me a bit sad like obviously me and Ste are the reasons he’s probably a bit like shouty etc and it does upset me and annoy me, but hopefully this can carry on and hopefully, Brooklyn will grow up into, like he is doing already but a more intelligent, wonderful little boy, like surfer dude hair like a cutie.

Read more advice from other young parents on the links below:

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